*Law of Mechanical Repair:** After your hands become coated with grease
your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.*

*Law of the Workshop:** Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible corner.*

*Law of probability:** The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.*

*Law of the Telephone:** When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy
signal.*

*Law of the Alibi:** If you tell the boss you were late for work because you
had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.*

*Variation Law:** If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were
in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)
*

*Bath** Theorem:** **When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone
rings.*

*Law of Close Encounters:** The probability of meeting someone you know
increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.*

*Law of the Result:** When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't
work, it will.*

*Law of Biomechanics:** The severity of the itch is inversely proportional
to the reach.*

*Theater Rule:** At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the
aisle arrive last.*

*Law of Coffee:** As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss
will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.*

*Murphy's Law of Lockers:** If there are only two people in a locker room,
they will have adjacent lockers.*

*
**Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets:** The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich
of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the
newness and cost of the carpet/rug.*

*Law of Location:** No matter where you go, there you are.*

*Law of Logical Argument:** Anything is possible if you don't know what you
are talking about.*

*Brown's Law:** If the shoe fits, it's ugly.*

*Oliver's Law:** A closed mouth gathers no feet.*

*Wilson's Law:** As soon as you find a product that you really like, they
will stop making it*